Those four years of high school go by so fast and they are filled with awkward moments and horrid trends that most look back on and think “What in the world was I doing?”. High School is filled with the stress of trying to get into the college of your dreams, taking the ACT or SAT and just trying to find yourself and where you belong. Its filled with experiences and disappointments but makes you learn so much about yourself.
I look at the Freshmen and pray they won’t make the same mistakes I’ve made. I hope they make themselves proud and learn to explore and take advantage of every opportunity they get. High School is an important time in your life, but one thing I’ve learned is that it’s a time to not take yourself too seriously. Work hard, but enjoy life. Surround yourself with amazing people and make time to have fun. No matter how much you want to leave to go off to college, you don’t want to look back on your four years of High School and have any regrets.
Ive been told by so numerous people that High School is the best time of your life. And in some ways it is! But I certainly hope life after only gets better.
I’ll admit I’ve been procrastinating a lot. College essays came out at the beginning of the month and I’ve looked at all of them and only become more overwhelmed. I have been avoiding them so much because I am so scared. I haven’t been able to bring myself to write anything because I know how important they are. I almost feel like it is inevitable that my essays are going to be terrible, but maybe that’s just the fear speaking.
I think of all the seniors from last year and wonder how they all did this. I have ideas about what to write; but, the hardest part for me is getting all of my ideas onto the page. I hope for the best for everyone else who is going through this process. The hardest part is starting, right? And if its crap, we can always rewrite and rewrite and rewrite, until somehow the 650 words we have written on the paper express how we feel and who we are.
For now I’m hoping for the best.
Museums are where I get to escape the world. To think of people creating the beautiful pieces we get to see hung upon the wall, is incredible. I love to walk around and imagine what it would have been like to live when the work was created. What it would have been like to have been the artist placing each brush stroke on the canvas. Art is something that is so important to me. I vividly remember a time when I hated museums like nothing else. I would cry when my parents would drag me to museums, now they are peaceful and quiet spaces where I get to think and admire. I cherish the moments I get to spend inside museums; they are my happy places.
I visited a playground by accident today. I was on a walk and saw a swing tire shortly in the distance and needed to go on it. Without thinking, I jumped on and my dad pushed and spun me around for a good 5 minutes. I’m starting to tear up a little but it made me realize how much I am going to miss him and everything in my not-so-small town when I leave for college. Life has gotten so much more complicated since I was in elementary school, playing on playgrounds without a care in the world. It makes me wish I could go back to when my world was perfect and I didn’t have a care in the world. I have lost so much and been through so much since then. But I think that’s just how life goes. The spontaneity of the whole situation today caught me off guard. It will probably be my favorite thing about this summer. It may seem insignificant but I can’t remember the last time I felt as happy as I did in those five minutes.
I read a quote a while ago that has really stuck with me.
“The worst feeling is feeling unwanted by the person you want the most” – Drake
As of now it explains a lot of my life. I’ve spent too much of my time on a guy who doesn’t feel the same way. Maybe it’s so hard for me to move on because we were such good friends but I need to realize that if he really wanted to be with me, he would have done something by now. There are so many more productive things I could be doing than thinking about this. But somehow, in the middle of the night you cant help but think of everything that is happening and everything that could have been. It’s part of the reason why late night is my favorite time.
I find that most of my days are spent just thinking and wondering about different situations. That’s why I am starting this blog. I need somewhere to put all my ideas and share my stories and adventures. There is constantly so much to do in so little time and I’m just trying not to get stuck in a routine that drags me through life so fast that I don’t get to enjoy what’s around me. Im hoping that this blog will be a way for me to enjoy everything and share my life with other people.
Taking a step back from all of my drama, who knew Drake could be so insightful? I’m actually pretty impressed.